Failure, Friendships and Dragon Slaying
My name is Kyle and I am a failure
Daily Blog #7
I’m a failure as an entrepreneur, a designer, a podcast host, a writer.
I’m a failure as a son, brother, cousin, friend, significant other.
I’m a failure as a student, teacher, mentor, mentee.
I don’t think I can go a day without fucking up. I’m not sure if I have enough will power or gas in the tank to get anything done.
I try my best to take every failure as a learning experience, to look on the bright side of all my downfalls. I’m 21 and I’ve helped run a clothing company, I’ve learned design, logistics, sales. I’ve hosted a podcast and networked with people who I think excel in their fields, I’ve packaged content into a format that allows my peers to learn from my conversations. I’ve written a zine that hasn’t been published (yet), I’m writing my second one, I’m trying to write everyday. I know what it’s like to be a workaholic and have your relationships suffer, I’ve lost some of my best friends, I’ve found myself distanced from some of my family. I’ve tried to teach others, I’ve tried to learn from others, I know what it’s like to have a tough time understanding something.
I have life experience beyond my years, I have grit, I have skeletons in my closet, I have baggage. I’ve admired people from afar and gotten the chance to look them dead in the face and not like what I see. I know heroes and idols aren’t real people. I know how to stand on my own two feet and I’m learning to lean on others. I know gambles.
I have to consciously remind myself that it’s okay to be in rough moments and not disassociate, it’s okay to suck because you’ll eventually get it, it’s okay to start all over and it’s okay to disappoint people. Life is one huge learning experience. I see a lot of people avoiding failure like it’s the plague, like now isn’t the time to fail. There isn’t a good time to fail, you just have to get it over and done with. You have to take leaps of faith and learn balance. It’s almost impossible to teach self awareness and the only way to really learn is to go out there, try, and you’ll either fuck up or succeed.
The biggest milestones all start out like the biggest disappointments, they all come from a place of not knowing. Nothing great is ever guaranteed.
